I would like to note that I have never cooked a single thing in my life. I'm totally faking it in these pictures because Lada wanted some awesome glamour shots of us, and I'm always happy to oblige. It was Lada and Isobelle and Lisa (and maybe Christophe?) who did all the actual cooking.

I was a little bit nervous about my scarf catching fire while pretending to barbecue, but removing it would've meant being about 85% less glamorous, and I already have a hard enough time competing with Lada.

Actually, so, remember how I said I'd never cooked a single thing in my life? While Lisa was doing stuff in the kitchen I asked her if there was anything I could do to help (as I always do) while praying she would say no (as I always do). She handed me the cutting board and a knife and three tomatoes and asked me to slice them. I confessed to her that I'd never sliced a tomato in my life and that I had no idea how, and she'd have to show me. She was visibly shocked and halfway didn't believe me, but I managed to convince her. So I cut the tomatoes and the mozarella for the salad! Lada remarked that I looked very serious and that I held the knife "like a murderer." I actually paused to send Marjorie (who also doesn't cook) a text message saying "Je coupe les tomates! Je cuisine! Wow!" and she texted me back basically saying cool, now we don't have to go to restaurants anymore, we can eat tomatoes all the time. Haha. Apparently I did a really great job too; everyone kept remarking throughout the meal that the tomatoes tasted especially well-sliced.

Note: I removed a Pringles can from the table before taking this picture.

There's Isa and Lisa, Lada and Christophe, and the dogs are Bonnie and Clyde.

This goes in the Favorite Pictures of Me Ever file.

And this would probably go in the opposite file, if that file existed. You can see I'm trying to remain extremely calm and still, like when a bee lands on you.

Lada asked me if I was going to put these pictures on my blog, and I said she'll know when she receives hundreds of marriage proposals from nerdy American guys.

After lunch, the whole gang went for a walk in the woods nearby. I think Christophe is trying to grab Lisa's ass? Pretty much everyone involved in this whole afternoon has some explaining to do for one thing or another.

I looked for the Loch Ness Monster all over Scotland in 2006 to no avail, and then Lada spots him in a lake in the Parisian suburbs. She brought this to my attention and requested that I document her sighting.

There's the uncropped version where you can see how small and non-monstrous it actually was; just a root.

And that's it! I went back to Paris that evening and than had another late-night picnic in another Parisian suburb with Marjorie and her sister and some French rock n' rollers. It's finally really, truly, officially, undeniably Springtime in Paris and I want to eat outside three (or four or five) times a day until Autumn.